No, I'm Not Mulan

I say this because the following post is a "reflection" (get it) of yesterday. Oh my gosh...it was just one of those days. It started off with reporting for jury duty at 8:45 a.m. Blake is trying to finish this multi-million dollar warehouse and so he couldn't watch Brody. I talked to my dad the night before and coerced him into watching Brody because there was no one else too. I arrived at the parking lot of the 2nd District courhouse in Ogden at 8:30 a.m. where my dad said he would meet me. Guess what?!? No dad. I call his phone. Straight to voicemail. I call again. Staight to voicemail. Call again, straight to voicemail. Call again...get the picture? After about 15 times and starting to build a mild panic in my gut I texted him. No response. Text again. No response. Now it is 8:40. I call my brother David. He is still asleep, dad didn't mention to him about watching Brody...oh crap. David volunteers (no joke) to get out of bed and drive to the courthouse. Brody now is done being strapped down Lagoon rollercoaster style in his carseat. Oh great, he just barfed all over my Ann Taylor, WHITE, tailored collared blouse. Awesome. Really awesome. Wait, the phone is ringing, it's my DAD! Oh, he's already INSIDE the courthouse. (Again, not the plan.) But whew, sigh of relief. Ok, Brody is still in his dinosaur glow in the dark pajamas because I didn't plan on him coming in. Whip them off him. What's that smell...you guessed it...blow out. 8:45 on my phone, grab the wipes, and let's go. Fastest diaper change and mini bath in the car ever! He's dressed. Grab his diaper bag, my purse, my jury summons, and we're out of the car. Ok, in the courthouse, go through security. Dad is there. Ok. Run into the courtroom. Tell the clerk I'm a nursing mother and I can't serve jury duty, she understands and tells the baliff to go tell the Judge. Baliff comes back, Judge says still has to be questioned. Well that's nice considering my Dad has a client he is supposed to meet at 10:30 a.m. Readers Digest version: "I'm Jessica Hall, I'm a registered nurse, My husband is a contractor, I am still nursing my son, my dad is a lawyer and a Judge who is holding my baby in the hallway, my sister is a poly sci major. I know the witness you just mentioned will be testifying, I am biased towards children who get hit on their bikes by people who are text messaging (that was the case), I am Princess Leah, I think everyone is guilty, and I'm psychic." I was still there until 11:00 a.m. after being asked multiple multiple multiple questions by the attorneys and judge. Run to Albertsons for double coupons. Checker argues with me, calls over manager. Manager calls corporate. I win. Fast forward. I am making dinner for a new mother in the ward. The homemade ice cream is not freezing, Brody is screaming his guts out because I'm not paying attention to him. I cannot get the grill to light, my rolls are rising to quickly, I don't have enough butter. Crap. Blake comes home and tells me that he has to go to side job tonight. Fabulous. After making 3 trips across town to the ladies house because I keep forgetting things I take Brody swimming at Jerry and JoAnns to show him I love him. He screams for the first 5 minutes or so then finally loves it. I come home, Blake still isn't home, get Brody fed and bathed. I'm still a drowned cat in my swimming suit, where's Blake, where's Blake. Ok he just pulled in the driveway, he'll be right in. Your kidding me, now he's getting on the lawn mower. Fine, I'll just shower myself and put Brody in his walker. Bad idea. Throws toys in the toilet. Pulls his little tub on top of himself. Screaming again. Finally Blake came in. I yelled at him. I still smell like chlorine. My hair is knotty because of said chlorine. Brody screaming again. GAH!!! Brody feeding. Puts his hand on my shoulder. Looks right into my eyes and smiles. Gives me loveys. Kisses. Falls asleep. Sleeps all night....I can do this, not that bad.