Let's be honest, I've finally come to the point where I really love my son. Yes, mingled in the last 8 months have been moments of adoration towards him, but I feel like now I truly love him. Boy, those first months were hard. I honestly had no idea what I was getting into. I thought I was prepared, I'd read literature, went to a prenatal class, and for heaven's sake I'm a freakin postpartum RN. Nope. I can't even begin to say how many "come to Jesus" moments I had where I truly just weaped/prayed at the same time. There were times where I didn't know if I would make it through the day. Fast forward to now, I love him. I can handle him. We understand each other. He loves his mama and I love him. We're still breastfeeding 3-4 times a day and doing solids with each meal. He loves to eat puffaroos and chunks of peaches. I make the majority of his baby food and when I get out of the cupboard a can of peaches or pears and see my Grandma Cooks handwriting "07" on the lid I smile, and think of how much she would just eat Brody up. It pangs me inside to think that she won't be here telling me how to raise Brody. But I know that she got to be with him before he came down to me. Maybe that's why he is giving me fits. Grandma always told me that I would have a child that was just like me. Moral of the story, everyone told me, "it will get better," and it now finally has. For all the new mothers out there: stick with it. Don't shake your child, even though you might want to, don't drive off the divide, and keep your head up.Friday, May 29, 2009
I'm Highly Philosophical
Let's be honest, I've finally come to the point where I really love my son. Yes, mingled in the last 8 months have been moments of adoration towards him, but I feel like now I truly love him. Boy, those first months were hard. I honestly had no idea what I was getting into. I thought I was prepared, I'd read literature, went to a prenatal class, and for heaven's sake I'm a freakin postpartum RN. Nope. I can't even begin to say how many "come to Jesus" moments I had where I truly just weaped/prayed at the same time. There were times where I didn't know if I would make it through the day. Fast forward to now, I love him. I can handle him. We understand each other. He loves his mama and I love him. We're still breastfeeding 3-4 times a day and doing solids with each meal. He loves to eat puffaroos and chunks of peaches. I make the majority of his baby food and when I get out of the cupboard a can of peaches or pears and see my Grandma Cooks handwriting "07" on the lid I smile, and think of how much she would just eat Brody up. It pangs me inside to think that she won't be here telling me how to raise Brody. But I know that she got to be with him before he came down to me. Maybe that's why he is giving me fits. Grandma always told me that I would have a child that was just like me. Moral of the story, everyone told me, "it will get better," and it now finally has. For all the new mothers out there: stick with it. Don't shake your child, even though you might want to, don't drive off the divide, and keep your head up.
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4 comments:
funny how ready we think we are and how different it is when we have a baby, hu. I thought I could do it and then when i had Rio I was lost, but like you said, it takes a while and then you REALLLLY LOVE them.
Lets be honest, I really love my children, but let me warn you as they get older you will see sometimes they really drive you crazy and the moments of adoration have to come back in between the time outs and getting in trouble. He is so cute. Blake came over the other day and I finally got to squeeze him, and he is darling!!
What an adorable picture of Brody, He has the most amazing smile and eyes - totally melts my heart every time you post a pic :)
Cute post too! I know I'll need to go back and read it again when I decide to start having kiddos ;)
I hear you girl! As they get older and easier you begin to forget how difficult they once were, and are QUICKLY reminded when you have a second one :o)
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